2/9/07

WHAT AN A HOLE

Nice way for a mother to speak of her son, don't you think? But really, today I can't help it. In actuality, I am absolutely wild about my kid. Maybe even more than a lot of parents, for all I know. He's my all time favorite person to be with for a zillion reasons. On the other hand, he can also piss me off. Kinda like today. What an freakin' jerk he is. Sometimes I can't believe he's mine.

Case in point: Earlier today, I woke up, tap dancing all around the house, prepping for my son's arrival this morning. I got up, got dressed, straightened the house, arranged all the fabulous things I bought for him and was calculating how soon I needed to leave, to be at the airport on time. It was then that I got a phone call and noting my caller ID, I realized this can't be good.
If my son's on the phone, that could only mean one thing:

He's not on the plane. Sh^t.

Sure enough, my little precious face, (almost 25 years old) slept through his alarm and bingo. He missed his flight. The significant thing about all this is: I shouldn't have been the least bit surprised. Leave it to Sonny Boy to somehow screw up scheduled plans. Of course, HE'S got a great outlook on things. His basic outlook was... Don't fret, Mom. I promise I'll make it up to you by being sure the two of us have a simply fantastic time together! MY basic outlook was: WHAT AN A HOLE YOU ARE. WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN YOU MISSED YOUR FLIGHT??? God, what an idiot.

Okay, so this isn't the end of the world. He'll arrive 3 hours later and boom, we'll go from there. BUT, this is exactly the reason I'm the only mother in the world who absolutely wouldn't let her son become a doctor. Especially in a specialty that had potential of life and death. OOPS. I FORGOT THE SURGICAL BLADE INSIDE THE PATIENT'S BODY?? UH OH. HMMM... NOW, DON'T WORRY, MR. SMITH. WE'LL FIGURE THIS ALL OUT. As if that'll somehow comfort the mourning Smith Family.

In the meantime, the best thing about my son and I is that we can be absolutely direct with each other. He never ends a conversation with me without telling me he loves me. And, nor do I. Today, however, I also added a tag line: WHAT AN A HOLE YOU ARE. Speaking naturally... out of sheer love and devotion. And a mere bit of occasional reality.

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