Because... IT'S HOTTER THAN HELL OUTSIDE, THAT'S WHY. Am so telling you... the coooool mountain air that is supposed to be surrounding me during all the summer months... IT'S GONE. As in: FOREVER. KAPUT. GOOD BYE. SWEAT YOUR SWEET LITTLE ASS OFF, EVERYONE.
We ain't NEVER going to see cool summer breezes here again, trust me. I remember well, my mother telling me years ago... OH... I AM SO SORRY... BUT, WE'RE OBVIOUSLY HAVING SUCH UNSEASONABLY HOT WEATHER THIS SUMMER. Oh no, you're not Mom. This IS your hot summer weather. For always.
Which of course is why I need to wear a bikini everywhere I go. Actually, I also need a huge swimming pool, like I had in Florida way back when, but that's a whole different story altogether. IT WAS A LIFE SAVER, believe you me. I used it everyday of my life for like at least 9 months out of the year, I'll bet. Which unfortunately also meant... I wore a bathing suit, too. I'm not saying I was HAPPY at having to wear one, but in the end, who the hell cared, since having to lounge in the pool on a floating raft was not even up for discussion. CRAZY ASS HOT TEMPS? Boom. Wear a bathing suit and hit the water. Ahhhh... how I loved laying on that raft, soaking in all the horrible, destructive UV rays that was TOTALLY ruining my skin. It was sheer heaven.
So... my take today is... yeah, you'd throw up seeing me in a bikini, alright... but, still... THIS SUMMER IS KILLING ME here with it's heat. Besides, just for you... I'll wear a one piece with as huge a cover up as humanly possible. But... when no one's here... hellooooooooo two piece.
The saving grace, however, to all this? The nights are basically BEAUTIFUL. Probably a 25 degree drop in temps from the day time high to night time lows. Which is good news since by evening... kiss the bikini goodbye. Hellooooo black, lacey baby doll pajamas. Well, uh... maybe.
