TOTALLY F-ed

I guess I must have been living in some kind of fool's heaven, when I thought that THIS winter I'd be perfectly fine should a winter storm occur and render me powerless. Literally. As in: possibly being without electricity for days on end. You may ask exactly what put me in such ignorant bliss and... well, I'll tell you.

For one thing, in my new home (1 year anniversary this month!) I have a gas fire place. YIPPEE!! GUARANTEED HEAT!! Secondly, no worry of hot water. Thirdly, given the first two, all I'd need for cozy comfort is my mandatory bag of Fritos and cans of Diet Coke and bingo. I'm set.

Well, except for my REAL life line which is my little portable, battery operated TV with which, thank God, I can stay connected to the REAL world. I've had to use this baby TV every winter at some time or another and believe me... IT'S A LIFE SAVER. I may not have the heat or power I wanted, but AT LEAST I could catch the local news and David Letterman. Who could ask for more.

Thus, as I said... here I was thinking, THIS winter was going to be slam dunk. I'll be in hog's heaven, having all the conveniences I'll ever need. I even pooh-poohed those who suggested I should get a generator. Thanks, but no Thanks. I've got all I need. THEN... OUT OF THE BLUE, Claudia corrected me. OH NO YOU DON'T. Huh?? I don't?? I'm screwed?? Quick answer: YES!! OH MY GOD... HOW???? It was then that she laid it on me.

Sitting down?? My TV will no longer be VIEWABLE come February of 2009!! EEEKS. I had completely forgotten about that!! OMG. I'm way DOOMED!! I'm also plenty freaked! Do they even MAKE digital battery operated TV's??? I sooooooo don't think so. Actually, maybe they do, but I can only imagine how much they've got to COST! Trust me... pretty pricey, I bet. What else is new. I just can't beLIEVE I never put two and two together to realize this was going to become a problem for me.

But... problem, it is. For, as important as the other items I've mentioned are, the TV is like almost three steps ahead of them, all rolled into one. WHAT?? NO CONTACT WITH THE OUTSIDE WORLD?? Yikes. So not cool. So, right away, when Claudia delivered this news flash me, I put on my thinking cap. What's my workaround?? Voila! I decided there may be a way around this, after all.

Not a GREAT workaround, mind you, but at least SOME sort of alternative, anyway. Here's what I decided: Okay...so the local news tells me snow, high winds, sleet, ice, etc. are on the way. All of which point to possible trouble. Right smack THEN, I'll head to the computer and... get this... I'll download every TV show and every movie and every audio book known to man. YIPPEE. I'm sort of back in the game. Well, maybe. Whether that can all REALLY be a substitute for being without TV for four days, I don't really know yet. On the other hand, I guess I have no choice, but to try it.

Except... perhaps there is ONE choice I might want to consider. That is... tomorrow morning, as soon as I get up, I am SO going to call my friendly little digital TV repair man, who is a basic genius. I'm hoping HE'LL be able to point me in the right direction and give me a really great easy fix to all this mess. Trust me... if ANYone can give me a clue, he can. Besides, being without the computer will be challenge enough for me. Throw in the loss of a TV and man, I am wayyyyy doomed. And screwed. And yes... even F-ed.