CONTINUING EDUCATION

Spending time with Laura is like furthering your college education. Not like the college I attended in late 60s, but more like the college of 2007. I swear to God... it's unbelievable what you can learn from Laura's Continuing Ed Classes.

First case in point: When Laura arrived here this morning, I remembered that I needed an updated photo for this blog, thus asked her if she would quickly snap a picture of me, so I could upload it. NO SOONER HAD I ASKED, than she immediately replied: DO YOU HAVE A LADDER??? Uh... excuse me?? I was asking for a snapshot, not a curtain installation, for heaven sakes. It turns out however, Laura knew exactly about what she was speaking, since she told me she would NEVER take a picture unless someone was shooting her from up above. As in: the the photograph-er has be "feet" above, so as to pose photograph-ee WAY more becomingly. That tidbit alone, is reason enough to enroll.

Next case in point: While Laura and I were driving around the city today, we got onto the subject of cars. First of all, she enlightened me all about her current leasing program vs. my purchasing program. She's got a brand new Audi, I think, while I'm still driving my ten year old car, with 50+ thousand miles on it. True, my car is in excellent condition and has never, ever given me a moment's bit of trouble. But regardless... get this... NOW I learn that unlike my car, the new cars of today don't HAVE cassette tape slots anymore! CD slots, only. Wow. Where have I BEEN?? Which made me immediately think: THEN, WHY EVEN BUY A NEW CAR?? The one I already have, has BOTH features. Not only that, apparently cars no longer come with lighters! WHAT?? When did THAT happen? Do they still come with ashtrays?? Laura rattled off a zillion other changes in cars nowadays, thus rendering the car I'm driving WAY out of date... practically vintage, actually. EEEKS. Consequently, I decided that if I'm gallivanting around the city in what turns out to be a vintage car, then I'll NEVER sell it. Why, with the features I've still got, I'm thinking it just may INcrease in value!

The last case in point: My education about Hookahs. Ever hear of one? It seems it's one of those deals that resembles a bong, from back in the 60's. THAT I know all about. Except Hookahs have lots of inhalation lines and are used by everyone in the Middle East. THAT I know nothing about. Anyway, I've lived here for 5 years... and never have I ever seen this place downtown called the HOOKAH HOUSE. Laura gets here and boom... she spots it almost immediately. Not only that, but she asked that we make a stop there tonight for our evening activity. Ready for this? WE WENT. We checked it out and I'm so telling you... its a hell of an experience. Unfortunately, they do NOT fill the Hookah with the terrific stuff we used when filling our bongs (I asked) but, it's a lot of fun, nonetheless. What they do instead, is... just as in the Middle East... is fill the Hookah with all KINDS of flavored spices/leaves which you do inhale, but has no nicotine, etc. It's sort of like going to a bar, here in the U.S. You sit around with friends, share the Hookah, hang loose and basically spend a few hours kicking back and vegging out. I guess it's the Starbucks of Egypt.

Anyway, in just one mere day, I furthered my education way beyond my greatest expectations. In fact, I HIGHLY recommend you too, take Continuing Ed classes. And, if you're REALLY smart, sign up for the class in which Laura is your instructor. You'll get way more than you bargained for, believe you me. Not only will you learn about body washes and prime sushi ordering, but best of all, you're practically assured an easy A+.