THE MESSAGE

Wow... now HERE was an interesting surprise. I was sitting with my girlfriend earlier today, having a lovely time, gabbing about all sorts of wonderful nonsense. The next thing we know... her cell phone rings and she apparently had just gotten a text message. Yippee... she read the message aloud, I listened, and in no time flat, we knew RIGHT away, the message was not meant for her. It was sent by the husband of a friend of hers and basically, here's what it said:

I'LL TAKE CARE OF THE WINE... COULD USE SOME TLC. HAVE HAD A ROTTEN F-ING DAY.

Our eyes lit up imMEDiately!! HUH?? THE WINE?? WHAT WINE?? NEED TLC?? WHY TELL ME?? As for the rotten day, like WHO CARES?? Oh... I'll tell you who cares, all right. The person for whom the message was REALLY meant!! As in: GIRLFRIEND. As in: GIRLFRIEND ON THE SIDE!! Whoaaaaa... this definitely gave a whole new spin to our nonchalant conversation!!

Can you believe it?? The guy is undercover with his ladyfriend, and unbeknownst to him, both my girlfriend and I are now ONTO him!! This was by far the most interesting inside scoop to come my way in a LONGGG time. I love when this happens. It's fodder for gossip, like, let's say... for... EVER! Amazing, is all I can say.

Okay... so what to do next?? CALL the guy back? THANK him for the blackmailing goods, should we ever need it? TEXT message him back? WHAT??

As it happened, my girlfriend decided to send a reply via texting. We went over and over what the content should be... I of course wanted to include some little caveat whereby we not only tell him of his mistake, but ALSO imply that we KNOW it wasn't meant for her. As in: You better watch your sweet little ass, my cheating little friend. But... she was far more discreet than I. She merely replied that he apparently sent the message to the wrong person, but basically, no big deal.

HOW LONG YOU THINK IT TOOK BEFORE SHE GOT YET ANOTHER TEXT MESSAGE??? Think: minutes!! Yessiree... he got his alert notice alright, and as soon as he could figure out the best way to extricate himself from his faux pas, his next message was... OH, YEAH... THANKS FOR TELLING ME. I MEANT TO SEND IT TO MY FRIEND, XYZ. Yeah, right. As if men tell other men they could use some TLC.

So, basically... there's a moral to the story, somewhere in here. In fact, probably several. The one I like focusing on best, however, is: Never Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth. Meaning, you just never know when, how, why you might be able to turn a perfectly normal day into one INCREDIBLY outrageous one. This guy has NO clue how much I appreciate his mistake. His mistaken message will give me YEARS of great chit chat with everyone I've ever met. Thank you oh so much, Mr. So and So. Talk about one's man's trash being another man's treasure.