GOING BRALESS

Trust me... the days of my going bra-less are WAY over. To relive THOSE days, I'd have to go back to my 20s, 30s and mayyybe early 40s. I can't remember. But NOW?? Oh Lordy. I don't even want to think about it.

Which is why I was embroiled in a major hunt this morning. Looking for my BRA! As it happens... for as long as I can remember, the VERY FIRST thing I do as soon as I walk in the house, is undo my bra and toss it anywhere that's convenient. It comes as natural to me as putting the key in the door. Lately, I've taken to unhooking my bra and hanging it on a sweet little chair that's in my dining room. It kinda works out perfectly for me and if it's not going into the laundry that day, then at least I know exactly where it is when I'm dressing the next morning.

Which is why I was so baffled when earlier today, I pranced over to the chair and lo and behold... there was no bra! Okay... so it must be somewhere else. No big deal. Except that it WAS a big deal, given I searched and searched my house up and down, over and over and STILL, no bra was to be found. A major mystery. And, forget about the mystery... time was now beginning to run short in terms of dressing. WHERE THE HELL WAS MY BRA, anyway??

Besides, this bra is my all time favorite. In fact, you can see it up there, in the pict. Get a load of the deep plunge. Kinda nifty, don't you think? I definitely love the look, but even MORE importanly, I love this bra because it has some magical power whereby it literally takes an old lady like me and BOOM! It turns you into a 16 year old in no time flat. High. Shapely. Perky. Way less costly than implants, too.

Anyway, back to the mystery at hand. It goes without saying, I have an entire dresser drawer devoted just to bras. All colors, all shapes, all fabrics. And, I certainly wouldn't be foolish enough to own just ONE of my favorite bras, thus finding a duplicate wasn't difficult at all. So, without missing a beat, I found a twin of my favorite bra, finished dressing and then figured I'll just have to call the Bra Police one day soon.

BUT... AHA! No sooner than I was dressed then BINGO. The missing bra was FOUND. Yippee... call off the dogs. Where WAS this fine piece of lingerie?? You'll never believe it. It WAS on a chair. Just not on the dining room chair. Instead, it was hanging on my computer DESK chair!! Thus, while doing my house search, I was unable to see it hanging there, given the chair was turned just enough so that bra itself was sort of hidden from view. Whew. I'm back in the game.

BOTTOM LINE TO ALL THIS: 1.) Why the hell did I even take OFF my bra while I was at the computer??? Eeeks. It almost sounds sleazy, doesn't it? And... I have to tell you, I have absolutely NO recollection whatsoever of having removed it while computing. Why WOULD I?? 2.) Don't get old. At my age, unless things are put EXACTLY where you put them day in and day out, you have almost NO chance of ever remembering it's location. 3.) I dedicate this entry to my Mother, who way back in my Flower Child days ALWAYS felt me up, checking to be sure I was, in fact, wearing a bra! Often, to her chagrin... I wasn't. Ahhh... talk about the good ole days.