I'M A REDNECK

I like to write "in the moment". And, right now, this is my moment. I just now came in from spending over an hour watering my trees... with the sun absolutely BLAZING down upon my body! Thus I am now, apparently a full fledged Redneck. Literally. I'm like sporting the reddest damn neck you ever freakin' saw.

My entire BODY should only become so red, so it could then become tan, and boom. I'd be a fit looking, bronzed-out sort of lady. However, no such luck. It's just my neck that's fire engine red. I think, anyway. I can't believe it.... for a college educated, well traveled, pretty worldly kinda lady... man, am I ever creating a whole new dimension for myself.

And, get this... it's after 6:00 p.m.!! So, WHY THE F IS THE SUN STILL OUT, ANYWAY?? Like, no where NEAR setting??? Man, this is crazy. Right now, at this hour of the day, you could absolutely get the strongest rays possible. MAN, I HATE DAYLIGHT SAVING TIME. Give me dusk and/or twilight as I'm making dinner ANY day of the week! Isn't the Sun God, Apollo, working overtime, here? Besides, who ever heard of needing protection from skin cancer at THIS hour of the day?? It's like a double whammy going on with me.

On the other hand, I imagine the people across the street are pretty damn chipper that it's still light outside. They've just moved in and about three hours ago, their moving van arrived with all the contents of their house. Oh yeah... I've already determined they have a king sized bed, given I thought I saw them carrying in what could be the mattress. Pretty much all the rest was in boxes, so I can't be too sure of the other goodies. I haven't see the big furniture yet though, so, I can't really tell what their decorating sense is all about. THAT I'll find out when I head over there some day to welcome them to the neighborhood. Anyway, given the sun still radiating like a crazy ass ball of fire, the movers will EASILY be able to unload the van until oh... about 11:00, I'd say.

So, I guess I needn't get all dolled up and head out to the County Club anytime soon. Given I'm a Redneck to the nth degree now, better I should instead, consider heading out to a rodeo. Or to pot bellied pork races. Or SOMEthing. I don't even know. Where DO Rednecks hang out, anyway? I'd like to know, given I kinda want introduce myself and make all sorts of new friends. It's like the old adage... birds of a feather, flock together. Hence, count me in.