YEARS' END

I swear to God... ever since this latest Facebook hookup, I haven't stopped laughing my ass off. These two renewed friendships from days gone by, have given me some of the best lines I've ever heard in my life. Unfortunately YOU won't be able to laugh right along with me, for trust me, am so sure you'd blush up the kazoo, that you'd almost choke. I, on the other hand, have been giggling like a ditzed out 16 year old school girl, except now... this 60 year old school girl has been around the block a bit more. I can't thank you enough, Dennis and Rick, for making this past week a blast from the past. Let alone, mighty enlightening. Wait... it's not EVEN a week yet! Whoa... talk about time flying when having fun.

In the meantime, other than Facebook, I've decided that one of the more interesting discoveries I've made this past year is my self proclaimed cookie diet. Oatmeal cookie, to be exact. And, I've kinda developed a sort of unique approach to this deal, here.

First of all, bear in the mind that contrary to any nutritionists' or doctors' suggestion for healthy eating, I begin each and every day of my life with a cookie. And, if that's not enough, I also end each day with one. I know, I know... SO not an acceptable approach. But... F it, I'm old and can do whatever the hell I want. Besides, I'm thinking it's good karma to begin and end each day on a, shall we say... a sweet note.

Actually, I've been following this non-conventional morning/night sweet treat idea for several years now. I don't remember how I discovered it, but I've gotta tell you... it fits the bill for my sweet tooth pretty much to a T. For YEARS, my cookie of choice was either an Oreo or chocolate chip. But... about 6 months ago, I had a guest here at the house, and figured I'd go out on a limb, do something completely out of the ordinary and GASP... select oatmeal cookies! Big stretch for me, believe it or not. I've always considered oatmeal cookies a MAN'S type of cookie. Have never met a gentleman yet, who didn't like them.

Anyway, guess what? I've recently decided that the oatmeal variety is actually pretty damn GOOD. It has oats, it has taste, it even has raisins. A dietician's delight, no? AND, get this... it also has what I guess you might even call "medicinal" properties! Uh... eat one of these each morning, boom. You've not only had a tasty little breakfast, but I swear to God... you've pretty much taken care of any morning constitutional problems you might be encountering. WHO KNEW? Eat the cookie. Boom. Hit the bathroom. Bingo... you're ready to begin your happy, digestive day with a hoot and a holler. Try it one day! Test the theory for yourself! I may have just given you the best hint of a lifetime! Well, sort of.

Granted, every once in a while I've got to tell Pat to revert back to picking up a pack of Oreos for me, but as of late, it's pretty much been oatmeal cookies all the way. So... my best suggestions for you for starting out the new year just right?? 1.) join Facebook and 2.) buy a package of oatmeal cookies. Oh yeah... and also try not to slit your wrists when we see where the economy's headed in 2009. Doing so, just may have to render my first two suggestions as a non issue.