INSIDE OUT

I'm getting really pissed at all the commercials we see lately whereby I actually have to VIEW the insides of my body. Like... who gives a crapola about little germie people running up and down my nasal passages? Or, along the ventricles leading to and from my heart? What about the creepy looking little insects completely taking over my kitchen and bathrooms?? Don't even get me started on the toes loaded with fungi. I HATE looking at these disgusting commercials! I so wished they could be banned from the airwaves.

True, you're talking to a woman who can't even check out her own X-rays, CT scans or the like. Why should I? I'm not who's gone to school to learn how to read these. THE RADIOLOGISTS ARE. Which of course is why I'm paying them. Just what I need. Any news of horrible things growing inside my body is bad enough. I actually have to SEE THEM, TOO?? So not my cup of tea.

Which is why I hate those ugly commercials of veins, vessels and/or nauseating cartoon like characters. Want to be sure I switch the channel lickety split? SHOW ONE OF THOSE ADS. Boom. I'm over and done. Besides, I've yet to see even ONE person become so damn enlightened from these sort of visuals. Do me a big favor... pleaseeeee stop littering my viewing pleasure by making me sick to my stomach during commercial breaks.

On the other hand, one commercial I DO LOVE is the FreeCreditReport.com guy. I must admit, I find his songs pretty snappy. Yeah, he's doomed as hell by his credit report, but still... he's wearing the biggest smile you ever did see, singing a basically excellent little jingle. Well, he should be smiling, I guess. After all, he's making zillions with his ads.

I also love commercials where they show really delicious shrimp and lobster dinners. Man, it makes my mouth water, every time they air. I'm like ready to fly outta the house any second, headed over to wherever it is that I can grab a plate of what they're showing. THOSE commercials are aimed right smack at folks like me. Talk about knowing your target audience.

In the meantime, tomorrow I'm scheduled for a mammogram. 1.) I'm pretty sure I'll get a clean bill of health. 2.) I'm even MORE sure I'm not looking at the xrays.