YEARLY UPDATES

The other day, yet another one of those family end of the year update letters arrived and both my son and I freaked. We just could not beLIEVE that people actually think we give a s*^# about every damn detail of their entire life for the past year. And, by details I mean details! THE DOORBELL RANG? COMPANY CAME OVER? YOU BAKED COOKIES?? OOPS. YOU NEEDED MILK TO GO WITH THEM?? Wow... what great info!! GEEZ... give me a break. This is so not what we care about.

Actually, all the things we REALLY cared about, you have probably already told us at the time it practically happened! So... WHY DO THE REPEAT BIT?? Not only that... the font on these letters?? Oh man... they are getting smaller and smaller by the year. WHY, YOU ASK? Because apparently so much MORE has happened since the year before, that the authors can't even GET it all onto one sheet of paper anymore. Oh yeah... which reminds me.... STOP ADDING ALL THOSE EXTRA PAGES! I am so telling you... am this far from opening the envelop next year and chucking the entire deal right smack into the trash before I even read one word.

Both my son and I had a really good laugh, by the way. He raised the question... like just WHY do we need to know every damn thing that occurred?? Are there like NO Event Censoring Police to help these letter writers weed out that about which we care and that which we don't care??? In fact, my son and I came up with a fabulous solution for all these guys. NEWS FLASH: FOR NEXT YEAR'S LETTER... HERE'S A SUGGESTION... let it read as follows:

Hi... just wanted to wish you a happy holiday. Oh yeah... this year, as in past ones, we were busy. We went places. We saw friends and family. Some things kinda sucked, some didn't. That's about it. Love, Us

Bingo. Letter done! THAT'S the sort of note we wished people would send from now on. It gets right to point. It lets us know you're thinking of us. And, most of all, it's not wasting our time nor making us strain our eyeballs to read the damn thing. So, with that, let me wish everyone a happy holiday and a healthy New Year. Oh, and one last thing...

I had a great year. In 2008, as in the past, I was busy. I went places. I saw friends and family. Some things kinda sucked, some didn't. That's about it. Love, Me