FIRST THINGS FIRST

It's becoming remarkably alarming at how I am continuing to become a total and complete idiot. I just can't believe how the closer I get to turning to 65, the closer I get to turning into a major asshole. There is just no question any longer. It's official. I AM LOSING MY MIND.

Well.... the story of my calling the police on Teresa should be proof enough. However.. THIS week, losing my mind is being proven all over again. Wanna here the lastest proof??

It all begins with the fact that much to my total surprise, I actually got a PRESENT this holiday season! I was stunned to say the least. But, even better is what I GOT as a present. The one thing I don't have!! As in: A SIX QUART CROCK POT!! Omg... I couldn't believe it. And.. it was oval shaped so I could EASILY pop in a whole chicken if I wanted. What a great gift. This is definitely an item I never owned before nor imagined I'd ever use. BINGO. I'm now on the band wagon.

Okay... so yesterday, I took out some left over already frozen pot roast and veggies and popped it into the pot. Boom. Five hours later, I ran to the kitchen and YES! I had a delicious pot roast dinner waiting for me to devour. Which I did immediately with sheer delight. Man was that good.

Then, today, I decided I'd actually COOK in the appliance. I took out the 12 beef ribs that I had Bonnie buy for me yesterday since I wanted the ribs to be the first thing I really MADE in the pot. Trust me... I was pretty psyched. My mouth was salivating all night long last night just knowing that today I would be having beef ribs. MY FAVORITE. Anyway...

What's the FIRST thing the manual tells you to do? NEVER EVER put the food in the actual aluminum lined cavity that encompasses the heating element itself. The cavity is merely a holding area for the REAL glazed ceramic pot in which the food cooks. Fair enough. That makes sense. In fact, a reminder is actually engraved right smack into the aluminum lining so that you DON'T FORGET.

So... what's the FIRST thing I do when loading the delicious food into crock pot? I PUT THE DAMN RIBS AND SEASONING LIQUIDS RIGHT SMACK INTO THE ALUMINUM SURROUNDING THE HEATING CAVITY!! Exactly where they tell you to NEVER EVER PUT IT. Plus I had it plugged into the electrical socket, no less. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? I'M THE DUMBEST DAMN WOMAN ON THE PLANET ALL OF A SUDDEN???

Man... don't even ask. It took me about five minutes before I noticed that there in the SINK, was the actual cooking pot... and NOT in the in the cooking element, afterall. When I realized what I had done, I WAS SHOCKED at my stupidity. Geez... it's like taking over DAILY now.

So the next thing you know, like a crazed chef,  I immediately corrected my mistake, removing all the food and liquid so I could wash out the WRONG part of the slow cooker and replace the food in the CORRECT part of the cooker. Man... if I don't get my brains back in my head by years' end I am going to be in BIG trouble come 2012.

In the meantime... the finished product?? ABSOLUTELY THE MOST DELICIOUS THING I'VE EVER TASTED!! It was like I hadn't eaten in weeks! I downed one, two, three beef ribs with outstanding enthusiasm. I loved every bite!! And, I had to IMMEDIATELY package up the the remaining ribs to be tossed in the freezer, for I can assure you... I'd have eaten them all right then and there.

So bottom line?? While for years I used to think this slow cooking was a major crock, turns out I'M the major crock. Yes, I may be the last woman on earth to own a slow cooker, but I'm now the first in line to sing it's glories. Perfect example of: Better late than never.